My Calling, Part Two

I know that we don't "own" our callings. I've seen real scenarios when people feel this way, and it isn't good.

I know that callings aren't actually based on career paths or personal identity, either.

I also understand that know-how is not what qualifies a person to receive a calling, not even a music calling. Actually, I learned that from Sister Newman specifically. But that's a tangent.

I know that sometimes bishoprics and branch presidencies can make mistakes. They are unlikely to do so when issuing a calling, since every calling is prayed about specifically. But even if they did, God does not make mistakes. That means he would have arranged for the bishopric's mistake long in advance. Callings are all ultimately from God.

I would not refuse a calling. If the logistics of my situation were a barrier to performing my calling adequately, I would explain those logistics and follow my leaders' counsel. I trust my leaders.

I have experienced firsthand that my priesthood leaders are flawed mortal men AND simultaneously chosen and qualified by God. I sustain and honor them, and always have. One important way in which I honor my leaders is by not saying bad things about them. I have not and never will do that.

I needed to gain a testimony in the leadership pattern for temple and family history work before I was given this calling. I can see now that some of the painful and difficult experiences I've had in the past several years were to teach me that the leadership pattern itself is inspired. When Sister Newman was first called to be the Stake Family History Center Director I met with her frequently. I taught her a lot of the know-how things. I set up an online sign-up system. I fixed some of the broken or poorly configured computer settings. When she had to be with her father, I conducted the large bi-stake family history activity. I knew how I would've done things, had I been in her shoes, or if I were to ever have become in her shoes. I thought about it explicitly. That way was "Kate's Way", not God's way.

Though I had a LOT of knowledge of facts and tools, I lacked her understanding of and faith in the priesthood leadership pattern as it relates to family history and temple work. I didn't even know that was something I lacked, either. It took a very long time and a lot of internal pain to learn that.

I have experienced being a ward temple and family history consultant for a long time, so I know intimately what some of the barriers and frustrations are in that calling. I am about to enter graduate school, studying Corpus Linguistics; I care a *lot* about words, and the words and titles in the church are changing on purpose, for inspired reasons, and especially in this part of the church. I'm also overwhelmed by things that are very different from what overwhelms "normal" people; juggling multiple big projects doesn't scare or intimidate me and I generally do well with it - ex.: I taught Middle School Arabic, have five kids, am learning Czech, etc. I have a deep understanding and interest in the details about how many family history tools and resources work, as well as 12 years of experience using them as they've evolved and changed. I have a firm testimony in the importance of temple and family history work. I believe it to be the work of salvation for the human family, so it's the most important work on the earth. It is the same work as bringing children into this world to create families and sharing the gospel with the world through missionary work. All of these are just the same work from different angles. I have a firm testimony now that the pattern we have is inspired. It is not the pattern I would naturally choose myself, either! I constantly have to look towards that pattern and align my will to match it, but my mind and heart have changed so that I can!

So now I have the unique position of having the know-how, the motivation, the experience, the contacts, the energy, the testimony, and the calling. I've been given the power to both run this center and teach the leaders in my stake their specific role in this work. I do not think that's a coincidence. I really want to have the chance to fulfil both these roles of sys admin AND leader-teacher. They seem at variance with one another, and perhaps in the future they will be, but I think it isn't a coincidence to give both jobs to a single person while people are learning to follow this new bottom-up approach. We need to get the center itself in line with the new philosophy of how to do temple and family history work. It's easier to do with one person in charge.

I feel like God has directly shown me that he wants me in this position now, and that I can fulfil this calling if I rely closely on the leadership pattern he established. I'm not the logical choice for this calling from an outside   perspective (ha!), but my inner self has been uniquely prepared and qualified, which is what matters. I have faith that God will help me arrange the logistical side of things.